


Pretty Hyunjin

by softlyuwujin



Series: lgbtq+ shit [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Heavy Angst, LGBTQ Character, M/M, OT9 - Freeform, Other, Polyamorous Character, Polyamory, Trans, Trans Character, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2020-01-07 03:16:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18401987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softlyuwujin/pseuds/softlyuwujin
Summary: High school can be tough. Especially for someone like Hwang Hyunjin.





	Pretty Hyunjin

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys. This is quite a bit different than what I normally write, but I hope it’s still okay!!
> 
> I’ve been feeling rlly dysphoric lately and this rlly helped me get my emotions out.
> 
> Also this is pure fiction obviously, I know that Hyunjin is a cis dood but I just can’t stop thinking about him dressing up and thinking “damn I wanna be known like this- like I’m a girl.”
> 
> So yeah also this is a non-idol au + they’re in high school

Hwang Hyunjin always knew he was pretty. It was one of those things that was painfully obvious. He was always told the fact all throughout his life, so how could he believe anything different?

 

When Hyunjin started high school nothing changed. He was still eye candy. He was still the boy that females and males alike all had a crush on. He was still the boy that everyone either wanted to be or to date. Everything was pretty much the same.

 

Until he met his friend group. They’d kinda just expanded over the years. At first, when Hyunjin was a freshman, he was in the same class as a sophomore named Changbin, who introduced him to his friends, a junior named Lee Minho, and two seniors named Kim Woojin and Bang Chan. Later that year a boy around Hyunjin’s age named Han Jisung transferred from Malaysia and somehow joined their growing group. When Hyunjin was a sophomore, they added three new members to their now-bigger-and-maybe-still-growing-but-they’re-not-sure-yet group. The new members being a new freshman named Yang Jeongin, another transfer student in Hyunjin’s grade named Lee Felix, and some other random sophomore named Kim Seungmin, who had accidentally stumbled into the classroom they ate lunch in. 

 

So then it was the nine of them. It was a little rocky, since Woojin and Chan had graduated and were off at university, but they always made sure to meet up with their favourite dongsaengs on the weekends and during vacations. 

 

High school was a confusing time for Hyunjin. Not just the school work, but mostly figuring himself out as a person. He started developing feelings for Changbin soon after they first met, but then sophomore year came and he met Jeongin, and then there was the fact that Changbin and Felix definitely had something going on. Hyunjin knew he shouldn’t have felt so  _ empty _ when Felix announced happily one day that Changbin finally asked him to be his boyfriend, but he couldn’t keep his heart from stuttering in a bad way. Maybe not a  _ totally _ bad way, because yeah Felix and Changbin were definitely cute, but he wanted to be apart of that too.

 

So he pushed his feelings for Changbin to the back of his mind, and let his feelings for Jeongin blossom. Until he also got feelings for Seungmin. And he wasn’t really sure where the feelings for Felix came from, but before he knew it, he had feelings for  _ four  _ different people. At the  _ same _ time. 

 

And then one day towards the end of the year, when Minho was taking Jisung to senior prom, Hyunjin noticed how  _ good _ they both looked. Especially Minho. He had done some makeup, and Hyunjin thought he looked  _ hot. _

  
  
  


He remembers being at Minho’s house with the others while they got ready. Only Minho and Jisung were going to the dance, but everyone, even Chan and Woojin, came over to help them get ready. Minho had turned around to show them the finished product. He had this  _ purple aesthetic _ about him. His button up shirt was dark magenta and he had a black tie to match his black,  _ skin tight _ jeans. His makeup- oh  _ god, his makeup—  _ the dark purple eyeshadow looked  _ perfect _ on Minho.

 

Minho had asked, “how do I look?”

 

“You look really fucking amazing, hyung” Hyunjin breathed out immediately after, and then blushed harder than he’d ever had in his entire life. It was quiet for a moment before Jisung cut in.

 

“You’re right, he does look amazing!” Jisung, Minho’s  _ boyfriend _ , smiled widely, and looked at Minho possessively. It made Hyunjin look down and his head started to hurt because of how bad he was blushing.  _ Why would he say that about his best friend’s boyfriend who is also his best friend? _

 

And then Minho did Jisung’s makeup, they were pretty much matching for the event, and Hyunjin had to hold back a choke. He cried himself to sleep that night. He now had feelings for six out of eight of his best friends.

  
  
  


Then at Minho’s graduation party, it was just a small get together with the nine of them at Changbin’s huge ass ‘mansion’ as Seungmin put it, Jeongin asked Hyunjin on a date. Hyunjin of course couldn’t say no. He was definitely confused why he had all these romantic feelings for six people, but Jeongin was definitely one of those six people, so it wouldn’t be bad if they were to date, right?

 

Wrong. It was  _ bad. _

 

He was dating Jeongin. Yet he found himself locked in Seungmin’s bathroom during summer break having a fucking  _ breakdown _ , and it was all because Seungmin held his hand during a movie. A  _ romantic _ movie. And Hyunjin just wanted to kiss him. Even though Jeongin, his very own loving  _ boyfriend, _ was sitting right next to him while he was thinking about it. 

 

There was a knock on the bathroom door and a soft, “Hyunjinnie, what’s wrong?”

 

“N-nothing, Jeongin, I’m— I’ll be okay” he stuttered out. There was a long pause.

 

“I think we need to talk.”

 

Hyunjin couldn’t breathe.

 

It took around ten whole minutes to get Hyunjin to open the bathroom door and come out. He found the two boys sitting right outside waiting for him. Jeongin was nervously biting at his lips and Seungmin led them to his bed. 

 

“Hyunjin” Seungmin started, and the boy in question looked up in fear.

 

“I’m aware that you don’t have feelings for only me” Jeongin stated the obvious. Hearing it out loud, from his own boyfriend, hurt him a lot. He let out a broken sob.

 

“I-I’m sorry…. I’m sorry— I’m  _ so fucked up _ ” Hyunjin sobbed angrily. The tears were back and they wouldn’t  _ stop _ . He needed them to stop. He felt  _ weak. _

 

_ “Shhh”  _ Jeongin tried to quiet him, and pulled him in for a hug. “Jinnie, it really doesn’t matter. You like Minnie right?”

 

Hyunjin froze. He wasn’t sure if the maknae meant Seungmin or Minho. But in the end it didn’t really matter because he liked  _ both.  _ “Y-Yeah, I’m s-so sorr-“

 

“I do too.”

 

“W-What?” Hyunjin tried to control his hiccuping, and looked up at Jeongin. 

 

“Jeongin likes me. And I like Jeongin. And I like you” Seungmin whispered, moving Hyunjin’s hair away from his eyes. Hyunjin was very  _ very _ confused. “Can I kiss you?”

 

“But my face is gross and snotty-“

 

“No, your face is  _ pretty  _ and snotty” Seungmin corrected. Hyunjin’s heart fluttered. He loved being called pretty. And before he knew it, Seungmin was gripping his chin to tilt his head upwards so he could place a soft kiss on his puffy lips. 

  
  


After that it got a little bit easier. Seungmin joined their relationship, and their friends were all really supportive. But then Hyunjin had another secret. Another dilemma that he had to deal with. 

 

He loved being called pretty. He always had. It made him feel good. But, as he laid awake in his bed for every night since Seungmin called him pretty, he thought deeper about this ‘obsession.’

 

He knew he was already pretty, but he wanted to be pretty in a different way. In the kind of way that Minho was pretty wearing makeup. Except it was different from  _ just _ makeup, because boys can wear makeup. He felt himself wanting more— wanting to dress up. He wanted to wear pretty things to make his pretty self even prettier. But wasn’t that  _ girly _ ?

 

He decided to do research on it. And after many blogs and articles, he kept seeing the same thing.  _ Transgender. _

 

But that wasn’t Hyunjin, right? He was a boy, he had a male body. Yet all of the websites he had clicked on kept saying that it doesn’t matter what you look like or what’s in your pants. So that got Hyunjin thinking.

 

He would only think at night, when he was alone. During the day he’d be at school and/or with his friends. And they could never know.  _ What would they say _ ?

  
  
  
  


Hyunjin did a lot of research. He was now almost finished his junior year of high school, and he was almost certain of his identity. Hyunjin was a girl. He— no,  _ she _ —liked it when Minho did her makeup, she liked it when she went home after so she could secretly put on a cute dress, she liked to wear her new pastel pink wig she’d bought online, she liked to join online forums and tell people that  _ she  _ was a  _ girl. _ And as much as she hated to keep this from her friends, she  _ had  _ to. They couldn’t know. And she’d surprisingly kept her secret well hidden for over three months. Until one day she lost track of time. 

  
  
  


They, as in her friend group, had decided to meet up at Changbin’s house for the weekend since Woojin and Chan’s summer break had already started. Speaking of Woojin and Chan, they were picking up Hyunjin at her house so they could carpool to Changbin’s.

 

Hyunjin had until 2:30pm to dress up and feel comfortable in her own body. Her eldest friends would be at her house at 3pm, so the thirty minutes in between would give her enough time to get out of her ‘ _ girly _ ’ attire and into something more ‘ _ boyish _ .’

 

It was around noon time, and she had just finished eating lunch. She was home alone of course, so she left her bedroom door open. She put her phone on the charger, forgetting to turn the ringer on, and made a beeline towards her walk-in closet. In the way back is where she kept her secret things. She also had been practicing with makeup, but she still wasn’t very confident, not like Minho. She sat in front of her mirror, opening her makeup bag and pulling out a cheap eyeshadow pallet. She decided that a light shade of pink would look nice with her outfit. After that was mascara, and then she applied a deeper pink—but not quite red— lip tint on her plush lips. She smiled at the finished product before grabbing her clothes. She paused for a second, contemplating whether or not she should put on the new bra she had got. Of course she would have to stuff the bra, and in the end she decided that she had enough socks to spare, so she did put it on. It was bright red and lacy. She stuffed it with minimum difficulty, and then carefully pulled on a light pink sweater, and then a pastel pink pleated skirt— kind of like the ones the girls at her school wore— and to finish off the outfit, she put on a pair of white knee high socks.

 

Next came the wig, which she had surprisingly kept neat, considering it had always stayed stuffed in the back of her closet. She put on a wig cap, tucking in her real hair the best she could, and then placed the wig on her head. It was long, down to her elbows, and it was a bit wavy, and it was a pretty pastel pink, and it had bangs, and Hyunjin thought it was pretty. Thought that  _ she was pretty _ . The wig and the makeup and the outfit made her look pretty in a different way than everyone else thought she looked pretty. She couldn’t help but smile at her reflection in the long mirror. This is how she wanted to look all the time.

  
  
  


It was already nearing 2pm, and Hyunjin was still in her outfit. She made the mistake of leaving her phone on silent. Which meant that she missed the texts that Chan sent her saying that they’d be coming to pick her up an hour early. Hyunjin sat at her mirror braiding her hair sloppily—she was still learning, so shush— and blasting Billie Eilish from her laptop. She didn’t hear the front door open, and she definitely didn’t hear the footsteps nearing her room. She only noticed when she looked up from her braid and saw Woojin in the reflection of the mirror.

 

“Hyung—  _ fuck!” _ Hyunjin slammed her laptop closed, the music stopping seconds later. She whipped around to find a very confused Woojin in the doorway. She couldn’t take it, she couldn’t take that  _ look _ that he was giving her. Tears spilled from her eyes, and she brought a hand up to muffle her sobs. She didn’t register that she was in Woojin’s arms, or that he had guided her to sit on the bed until at least two minutes after it happened. She cried into her eldest friend’s shoulder, not caring that his nice shirt was now wet and ruined with makeup. “Hyung, I’m sorry, I’m  _ so  _ sorry, I’m so  _ gross _ and  _ disgusting  _ and-“

 

“Shhh, no, that’s not true, Hyunjin” Woojin shushed the younger, rubbing her back soothingly. She took a deep breath and nuzzled farther into Woojin’s neck. “You know what I think, Hyunjin? I think you’re pretty, I think you’re beautiful, no matter what you wear you’re still Pretty Hyunjin to me.”

 

“But hyung it’s not just that!” Hyunjin sobbed, pushing herself away from Woojin. “I-I’m…. I  _ feel  _ like a  _ girl _ , hyung, that’s  _ gross.” _

 

“How long have you known?” Woojin asked dryly. It scared the younger. 

 

“Um, a-a while….” Hyunjin whispered, looking down. Woojin cupped her cheek and forced her to look up. 

 

“Why didn’t you tell us?” It was a simple question, but Hyunjin could see the hurt in Woojin’s eyes. It made her tear up again.

 

“Because I was scared, hyung, I-I  _ am _ scared” Hyunjin answered shakily. “T-This isn’t s-something that’s widely a-accepted….”

 

“ _ Oh _ ” Woojin breathed out, and the realisation of the situation seemed to hit him. He sighed. “Okay, yeah, that is true. But I highly doubt that any one of our friends would be upset about this.”

 

“Upset about wh-  _ Hyunjin?”  _

 

Hyunjin sobbed again, and hid her face in Woojin’s shoulder once Chan showed up in the doorway. Woojin gave him a look, and he softened, making his way over and sitting behind Hyunjin. 

 

“Channie, don’t you think she looks really pretty?” Woojin said aloud, and Hyunjin visibly tensed up. Chan was confused for a moment before hesitantly answering.

 

“I agree, our Hyunjinnie is such a pretty girl” Chan said softly. He brought a hand up to pat the faux hair on Hyunjin’s head. “Did you braid this yourself? It looks really good, Hyunjin.”

 

“Why are you acting so  _ normal _ ?” Hyunjin whined. 

 

“Because it isn’t  _ unnormal _ ” Chan said. “Do you prefer she/her pronouns?”

 

“Y-Yeah….” Hyunjin nodded, sitting back and turning to look at Chan.

 

“There’s nothing wrong with that. Would you like it if we called you a different name than ‘Hyunjin’?”

 

“No, H-Hyunjin is f-fine” she stuttered out, wiping her eyes and nose on her sleeves.

 

“We’ll always support you, Hyunjin” Woojin said, leaving a kiss on her forehead as Chan hugged her from behind. Hyunjin thinks that’s when she fell in love with her other two best friends. 

  
  


After her little breakdown, she put on her regular clothes and washed off the little makeup that was left on her face. Woojin and Chan told her she could continue to wear it, but she wasn’t anywhere near comfortable with telling the others about this yet. So once everything was back in her closet, they went to Changbin’s house and acted like everything was the same as always.

  
  
  


A week after Woojin and Chan found out about her secret, she decided that she should confess to them about her other secret. The secret that she was in love with not only two of her best friends, but all eight.

 

“Hyunjinnie, do you want more popcorn?” Chan asked, already standing up. 

 

“Um, actually, can we talk?” She asked nervously, biting at her gloss covered lips. Woojin paused the movie, some dumb romance film, and turned to the younger. Chan sat back down.

 

“Of course, what’s up?”

 

“I…. please don’t think differently of me, and um, please don’t hate me” Hyunjin started. She couldn’t even look at them, especially when they were staring at her so worriedly. “I also haven’t even told Seungmin or Jeongin yet because I don’t want them to be mad.”

 

“Tell them what?” Woojin asked.

 

“That I’m…. um, I’m i-in love with- I’m in love with you” she stuttered, her bottom lip wobbling uncontrollably as tears gathered in her eyes.  _ Why did she have to be such a crybaby?  _

 

“Me?” Woojin asked in surprise. He shared a look of shock with Chan.

 

“A-And Chan-“

 

“And Chan?!” Woojin asked at the same time that Chan said, “me?!”

 

“And Minho, and Jisung, and-and Changbin, and Felix, and of course I still love Seungmin and Jeongin too” Hyunjin sighed once she finished. It felt nice to finally admit all of that out loud.

 

“Wow” Chan breathed out, and Hyunjin spoke up not even a second later.

 

“I hate it, hyungs, I hate these feelings, why am I so  _ fucked up _ ?”

 

“Baby, you’re not fucked up” Woojin whispered once they both had her secured between them in a hug. “How long have you liked everyone this way?”

 

“Mostly since freshman year and sophomore year….” Hyunjin whispered, afraid that if she spoke any louder her voice would crack and that’d be even more embarrassing. She felt Chan inhale sharply.

 

“Damn” said the second eldest. “I really wanna kiss you right now, but I know Woojin will hit me and yell at me because I need to wait for the right time.”

 

“What if I said ‘fuck waiting for the right time’?” Hyunjin pouted, staring at Chan hopefully. Chan chuckled and ruffled her hair—she wasn’t wearing her wig at the moment— and kissed her cheek instead of her lips.

 

“That’s not fair to your already-boyfriends, love” Chan pointed out. 

 

“I think we need to have a talk with our whole friend group, Hyunjin” Woojin said sympathetically, and Hyunjin’s pout deepened. “It’s not fair that you’re keeping so much from them.”

 

“Yeah, you’re right, hyung” Hyunjin sighed and leaned her head back to stare up at the ceiling. 

 

===

 

**To: GAY KIDS GC!!!**

 

**From: HYUNJIN**

Hey guys. There’s some things I need to come clean about. Woojin hyung and Chan hyung already know, and don’t feel bad that you didn’t know first. I wasn’t planning on anyone finding out.

 

**From: JEONGIN**

what is it hyung?? (´・ω・｀)

 

**From: JISUNG**

what’s up bro 

 

**From: FELIX**

you can tell us anything mAtE +Binnie is at my house but his phone is ded 

 

**From: MINHO**

tell us what’s wrong jinnie

 

**From: SEUNGMIN**

I’m here- just makinf toast but I’m listenung 

 

**From: MINHO**

god seungmin your spelling makes me gag

 

**From: JISUNG**

just like how you were gagging on my peepee last night (΄◉◞౪◟◉｀)

 

**From: FELIX**

THERE ARE CHILDREN PRESENT HAN JISUNG!!!! but damn get it bro ;3

 

**From: CHRIS**

can y’all literally stfu Hyunjin is trying to say sumthin 

 

**From: HYUNJIN**

thank you hyung :((

Anyways.

Some of you might hate me or get mad after this but it needs to be said.

I’m a girl.

And if you don’t accept me Woojin gave me permission to say ‘fuck you’

 

**From: CHANGBIN**

fuck this was important enough for me to get my phone (sorry yeah it’s not dead y’all I lied I was just lazy) but Hyunjin ily no matter what you identify as

 

**From: JISUNG**

oh jinnie omg :(( of course we support you 

 

**From: JEONGIN**

omg I never thought Seungmin would ever get a girlfriend (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)

 

**From: SEUNGMIN**

Jeongin if you don’t stfu I swear

but jinnie we would always love you <3

 

**From: FELIX**

H W A N G H Y U N J I N ! !

and you never told me :((

I literally love you so much mate

Like wtf I could never be mad at you for that

 

**From: MINHO**

damn is that why you’ve been so interested in my makeup lately lmao

 

**From: HYUNJIN**

yeah kinda (*´◒`*)

And bc you look hella hot

 

**From: JISUNG**

oh??????

 

**From: HYUNJIN**

which leads me to the next confession.

I love you all a lot 

Like I really love you guys

 

**From: FELIX**

we love you too :(( <3

 

**From: HYUNJIN**

no

like

I’m in love with all of you.

As in I want to do the same things with the rest of you that I do with seungmin and jeongin.

Sorry I sound stoopid 

 

**From: FELIX**

oh

 

**From: JISUNG**

oH

 

**From: JEONGIN**

o h ϵ( 'Θ' )϶

 

**From: CHANGBIN**

Oh

 

**From: MINHO**

O

 

**From: HYUNJIN**

not to be a bitch but can y’all type something different. It’s making me anxious.

 

**From: SEUNGMIN**

o-

yes dear

 

**From: HYUNJIN**

pls guys I’m rlly scared. this isn’t an easy thing to deal with, but Woojin hyung told me it was better to be honest about my feelings :(((

 

**From: WOOJIN**

Yep ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

Now you guys better fucking answer hyunjin honestly.

But let Jeongin and Seungmin go first bc they’re the boyfriends.

 

**From: SEUNGMIN**

I’m down for it

I’m already in a poly relationship so

And I like y’all too

Maybe not ‘in love’ like Hyunjin apparently is but I’d be willing to try it out :))

 

**From: JEONGIN**

yeah I agree!!

I started like-liking some of you already so I mean-

It wouldn’t be that wacky （╹◡╹）♡

 

**From: FELIX**

me and changbin are ready to sign up ;))

 

**From: MINHO**

damn I rlly thought I was gay but I guess I’m str8 for one (1) girl only 

And that girl is Hyunjin 

 

**From: JISUNG**

úwù 

Relatable 

I’m down !!

 

**From: HYUNJIN**

thank you guys for not disowning me :((

omg I picked the right squad to fall in love with and I’m rlly happy :’((((

 

**From: FELIX**

okay everyone at Changbin’s asap we need big poly group cuddles rn 

 

**From: CHRIS**

wait Seungmin is your toast still toasting 

 

**From: SEUNGMIN**

fUCK—

 

===

 

“Hyunjin  _ noona _ , I literally cannot believe you kept this from us!” Felix whined pulling the older onto his lap. Hyunjin let out a cute squeak.

 

“F-Felix, my skirt!” Hyunjin shrieked as her skirt indeed lifted up. Woojin fixed it for her and placed a quick kiss on the top of her head. She blushed as everyone joined her and Felix on the sofa. 

 

“Damn, did you do your makeup yourself?” Minho asked, gripping her chin and tilting her head in his direction. “You’re getting better, babygirl.”

 

“I wanted to call her that, you whore!” Chan whined, jumping on Minho’s lap to get closer to Hyunjin. He swatted Minho’s hand away, earning a scoff from the owner of the hand, and then he cupped Hyunjin’s cheeks gently. “Can I kiss you now?”

 

Hyunjin nodded, and Chan leaned forward, capturing her lips in a soft kiss like he wanted to give her a few weeks prior. Hyunjin pulled away with a love-drunken smile. Chan’s expression mirrored her own.

 

“Wow, your lips are softer than I imagined” Chan laughed, and Hyunjin blushed.

 

“wAIT I WANNA KISS OUR NEW GIRLFRIEND!!” Jisung screeched, and then everyone else felt the need to kiss her too. Hyunjin felt so light and giggly with all eight of her boyfriends. She never would have thought her life would turn out this way, never thought she would be this happy. Yet here she was, and she wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope that was at least okay or I hope it like made sense and shit,,
> 
> If any of you are ever feeling bad or whatever or something like this is similar to what you’re going through (or even if it’s not) pls don’t hesitate to message me (my insta is softyoshii)
> 
> Anyways,, bye bye guys don’t forget it’s woojins bday owo


End file.
